Sunday, September 4, 2011

Yikes, Little Girls with Big Question

It is the one question most adoptive parents dread.  "Why did my mommy who carried me in her tummy, not keep me?"  That's how the question was asked this morning.  It was the usual Sunday morning, the girls laughing and singing together.  I told them how lucky they were to have each other and their older siblings.  Tatum quickly ask "Did my mommy carry me in her tummy like Briley is carrying Bess?"   With the excitement around our house of a new baby, our girls must be thinking about their births. We have always been open with Tatum when she ask questions about whether are not she grew in my tummy.  I knew we were working up to "the question" one day.   I have read everything I've come across and everything given to me about adoption.  I knew one day our girls would ask but, how do you truly prepare to answer such an important question from your child.  I didn't really expect it so soon.  I think I expected that the question would come from Kenley. Being adopted at an older age, her knowledge of where she came from is obviously greater than Tatum's.   I have listened to Kenley as she has told me about her life in China.  At this point I feel she had not been told anything about her birth parents or how she came to live at "The House" (as she calls it).  The way  I look at it our girls are lucky to have two sets of parents, one that loved them so much that they gave them life and loved them so much they allowed them to be adopted so  they could be given a better life.  Then the one who loved them before they knew them and wanted them so badly that they traveled half way around the world to bring them in to their family.  Without a doubt I know that the girls were born to be our children, born to be a part of our family.  This was without a doubt God's plan.   My prayer is that they will be secure in the love that comes from their family, that they will be strong women who love Christ and that they will  live out their lives for Him.  I have prayed for the girls birth parents before, cried for them that they will know their daughters are safe, loved and cherished.  Kenley's question today was a reminder for me to pray again and to continue.

2 comments:

  1. That is a very tough question. I think about that for our little one that we will soon adopt.

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  2. how will you answer the question, if it was god's plan for her to be part of your family then it was god's plan for her mother to never want her?
    i have struggled with this line of questioning with my son. i don't really know how to answer this. any books you can recommend?

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